Where have all the cute boys gone? Long time passing…

I suggest you don't miss the Radiohead post, below.

As promised, here’s some discussion of my time in Europe. I’ve lived in several different places across Canada, each place begging the questions, “Where are all the cute boys?” They seem to be nowhere. They weren’t in Vancouver, they’re all nerds in Toronto, they’re definitely not in Ottawa. This mystery continues from sea to shining sea, and maybe I’ve missed the cute boy deposits in North America, but I don’t think so. Now, I have my answer, and an answer for you, single ladies o the new world, they are in Europe. They’re much cheekier there too.

It all begins in Italy. My friends were convinced that I was getting hit on the most in Rome, I’m not sure what trip they were on. The only incidence I remember pertaining to such a ridiculous conclusion was a waiter calling me “bella” or something generic like that, which absolutely doesn’t count since he was clearly just trying to get us to spend money at the restaurant. I don’t remember what else went on there. In Florence one of my friends got a “Hey, baby face!” which is clearly hilarious, and also a “Ask for me, get a free drink.” We don’t know where we were supposed to ask for “me”, though. Florence also had cute gelato guy, really adorable, and gave us bonus dollops of gelato of a random flavour. Moving up from boys to men, the proprietor/waiter dude at the fancy restaurant we went to for a multi-course lunch was quite saucy and flirty. He asked us about Canada, made these little faces at us, made us giggle sickeningly. Not that we’re complaining.

In Venice there were these 2 Argentinean guys who were eating at the table next to ours, and were obviously drunk. They asked me what nationality of guy was my favourite, I said I didn’t have one, but I was tempted to say “definitely not Argentinean.” Then one of the dudes started talking in a southern American accent and said he could be anyone. So I piped up and said, “Hey, can you be Canadian?” To which I got the reply, “I can if you marry me!” Yeah, real winners there.

Then Germany. In Munich me, my two friends, plus an extra (German) friend had all gotten ice cream and were sitting under a monument infront of city hall (big square, Glockenspiel, etc.). First of all, this random guy asked if we could take a picture of him and the fancy city hall building, which I did b/c it’s the give and take code among tourists, you see. Then he came back over for like half a second, snapped a picture of the 4 of us, smiled, waved, and ran off. Weird, but harmless. Then, all of a sudden, we found ourselves surrounded by crowd of guys standing around us, asking us why we were sitting on the ground. I don’t see why it was so confusing for them, we needed a place to sit and enjoy our ice cream, the ground was basically the only option since there were no free range chairs around for us. One of the guys was Canadian, with whom we had a pleasant and civil conversation. This dude from Saxony (I really think he was part vampire from Transylvania) kept asking us to go with their group to a beer hole (I think that’s what they’re called) and tried to be “charming” – shoot and a miss. And there was this other loud, random guy who came over every 10 minutes or so and said “Hello, get up, please, and follow me!” We ignored him.

In Paris there were more random acts of flirting in the streets. These things are odd for a North American, the forwardness, the interaction with people passing on the sidewalk… we just don’t do it up like Europeans do. Guy on the street made this really long kissing noise at one of my friends. Oooh, but we did meet a really nice guy at Notre Dame (I think he was American, North American at any rate). He saw us trying to take a picture of ourselves with the church, at which we were unsuccessful, resulting in a hilarious self-photo, and offered to take one for us. We took one for him in return. He said the photographic technique of the one we took was better, but that the one of us was prettier, I think b/c of the subject matter. So he managed to flatter us doubly, and of course we liked him. There were many others, but I can’t remember the anecdotes right now. Meghan has all these things catalogued. There were a lot of up-downs received by my two hott friends.

This brings me back to my encounters with flirtatious males in my own country. You see, I don’t get this kind of attention from guys my age, or ones that might be cute or friendly, or anything not creepy. No no no, I always get the weird, creepy old guys making inappropriate comments in my direction. Like the guy who followed me down Yonge street for like 6 blocks and only started talking to me after about 3 blocks. No, sir, I will not tell you where I’m going or where I live. I’ve seen the last 3 minutes of Care Bears and I know a little better than that! And just yesterday, I’m riding my bike to Canadian Tire and this cab driver, waiting at a light beside me starts yelling, “Sophie! Sophie!” as if it were my name. I ignore him, so he changes it up to “Isabelle!” Who just tries random names? Then it was “Ma belle!” and I covertly shake my head, and he says, “Ok bye!” a few times, until finally the light changes and I gun it out of there. Reminds me of going out clubbing in T dot for one of my friends birthday, and who tries to pick me up? It’s the 45 year old man who just walked in and decides to tell me “You’re absolutely gorgeous.”

These are just a few of the wonderful moments I have collected. And no, I do not feel flattered by these ones, where creepy old guys find me approachable enough to violate my personal space. I’m not sure what it says about me that I don’t get friendly comments from guys my own age, but I shouldn’t say that b/c the random lines by weirdos in the street is not every girls favourite thing, even if dude is age appropriate.

Anyway, I should move to Europe. Do me a solid for vanity.